Wednesday, November 25, 2009
forgot to mention: i love my co-workers! they are so kool and we get along so well. btw, i work with my sister which is just as kool! they will be the hardest part of leaving this place. i wish we could all find another place where we could all work together in harmony, prick free. that alas, is only in dreams..maybe?
severe anxiety
i know no really reads my blog, but that's okay. it's really more for the cathartic aspect of it (i yet to feel its effects!). you know, getting things off your chest and things like that. it really should be a continuous routine, not just whenever i remember to write something up.
lately i have been in a real slump and predicament about my job. i hate my boss. and i mean hate. he's a misogynist prick, type a personality. everyone at work doesn't like him. seeing my boss, hearing everyword is very grating on my nerves. so obviously i need to change jobs or more like career. i would love to be one of those people who profess that they absolutely love their job. why can't i be one of those people, i ask. so the logical next question would be: what are you doing about it? well, i looked into life coaches that specialize in career changes, but they are expensive. around $500 for four sessions is the average! so instead i signed up with my alma mater, CSU East Bay, in hopes of seeing a career counselor. i have yet to receive my password in the mail (it was supposed to take 3 days and is has gone on longer than that) so i can sign on and schedule an appt with a career counselor before they start xmas vacation.
my friend at work has been going back to school to attain a higher education so she can fly this coupe. i must admit that i am jealous. or maybe just more afraid that she'll leave this place before i do. i don't want to feel defeated by all this. i know that it's not hopeless and that i will make it out of here, but it's just the here and now that has left me stifled. the whole process of getting yourself going and putting yourself out there. i have expressed interest in doing something in regards to environmental issues. there is a person in my kaiser social phobia class that works for a non-profit organization that deals with the evironment (in what capacity i'm not sure). i should be trying to network with him, but the social phobia thing, you know. i had the opportunity last night in class when we had to all take turns and talk for five minutes to someone that played the "active listening" role, but chickened out about talking about new careers and spoke of something else all together.
oh, yes! must mention coping statements. i used it for dealing with work situation and they have helped. this is what i have so far:
i can't compromise on my happiness
i am what's important
i can't second guess myself because i have made the right decision to move on
he (the prick boss) is merely a speck in the larger scheme of things and specks can be blown
away!
i have a great support system and foundation of love
i am not alone
must keep my eyes on the prize
so there you have it. i must sign off now. happy thanksgiving to all.
lately i have been in a real slump and predicament about my job. i hate my boss. and i mean hate. he's a misogynist prick, type a personality. everyone at work doesn't like him. seeing my boss, hearing everyword is very grating on my nerves. so obviously i need to change jobs or more like career. i would love to be one of those people who profess that they absolutely love their job. why can't i be one of those people, i ask. so the logical next question would be: what are you doing about it? well, i looked into life coaches that specialize in career changes, but they are expensive. around $500 for four sessions is the average! so instead i signed up with my alma mater, CSU East Bay, in hopes of seeing a career counselor. i have yet to receive my password in the mail (it was supposed to take 3 days and is has gone on longer than that) so i can sign on and schedule an appt with a career counselor before they start xmas vacation.
my friend at work has been going back to school to attain a higher education so she can fly this coupe. i must admit that i am jealous. or maybe just more afraid that she'll leave this place before i do. i don't want to feel defeated by all this. i know that it's not hopeless and that i will make it out of here, but it's just the here and now that has left me stifled. the whole process of getting yourself going and putting yourself out there. i have expressed interest in doing something in regards to environmental issues. there is a person in my kaiser social phobia class that works for a non-profit organization that deals with the evironment (in what capacity i'm not sure). i should be trying to network with him, but the social phobia thing, you know. i had the opportunity last night in class when we had to all take turns and talk for five minutes to someone that played the "active listening" role, but chickened out about talking about new careers and spoke of something else all together.
oh, yes! must mention coping statements. i used it for dealing with work situation and they have helped. this is what i have so far:
i can't compromise on my happiness
i am what's important
i can't second guess myself because i have made the right decision to move on
he (the prick boss) is merely a speck in the larger scheme of things and specks can be blown
away!
i have a great support system and foundation of love
i am not alone
must keep my eyes on the prize
so there you have it. i must sign off now. happy thanksgiving to all.
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